Wednesday, August 13, 2014

Time , Freedom , Clarity and News!

This summer , with the sale of Maggie, I have had time to do other stuff with out that nagging voice in the back of my mind that  I need to work a horse. Ever since her selling,  there has been offers after offers of horses crossing my radar. It seems everyone has a horse for sale, or a horse to give away.  I have turned alot of nice horses away that probably would have been great mounts but I had to be honest with myself.  I am enjoying hiking, gardening, kayaking, floating the beautiful Montana rivers , boating on Flathead lake and just taking a huge deep breath. Summer in the Flathead Valley is magical.  No place better to be June , July, August  and even into October.

I am  occasionally riding JB and Rebel but it was only to help keep them in shape for the upcoming (this weekend) Horseback archery competition but that is it. My riding has been minimal. Unfortunately, both horses last week went lame on us. Rebel got a little inflammation from past laminitis issues because I had been letting him out on pasture. I thought it was dried up and cured enough but apparently there were still enough sugars in the grass to cause him just enough inflammation to irritate things.  I noticed it right away and penned him up.... much to his disliking.  He bounced back to sound a few days ago so he is still a go for the competition.
JB on the other hand, we aren't sure. I was cantering  JB last week and he took a bad step with his front left and came up lame. Need I remind you all... the front left is the good leg. The right is the Pastern Arthrodesis. We did not need this.  We were finally getting him back into some level of fitness and his canter was really freeing up .
The best we can tell, he stone bruised. I thought maybe the heel bulb but there is no evidence of that. We will just wait and see what transpires over the next week or two. There has been no swelling, no heat, no signs of inflammation other than he is off and remains off. He will not be competing. (insert sad face)

For the last several weeks, I have been trying to figure out where  horses fit in my life?  I have so many other interests.  How do I balance them all?

Do I just give the horses up and become the supportive wife of a horseman? Become the occasional rider?

Other people have busy lives and balance it,  why can't I?

Why do I get so wrapped up and one track minded about making sure my horse is worked and not just sitting?

What does it matter if my horse sit in the pasture and hang out? They are just as happy to be out there in the pasture hanging out than they are being ridden.. probably more so.

In the end,  I get myself so burned out because I am trying to do too much.

Truth be known?? I do it in my professional career too.. I put waaayy  to much pressure on myself.

It struck me in late June. I got really , really,  REALLY sick. Sicker than I ever remember getting.  I was on the couch for  days on end, and at one point the doctors were trying to decide if I needed to be admitted for IV antibiotics.  It was an awful bacterial flu.They thought I had Meningitis. I thought I was going to die. I was in so much pain.  I went through two rounds of different oral antibiotics.  The first round just tipped the bacteria on its side a little and then it came back with a vengeance. The second round finally kicked it Eventually I started getting the upper hand. It took a month to recover fully. I was off work for two weeks and when I did return, it was only part time for another week. I was still recovering when we went to San Francisco.

So, I came away with a new found clarity about things. Even though I work remotely , I am working very hard at  keeping NORMAL office hours. No more of the get up at 3 am , log in and work till 10 pm. No more fretting and losing sleep over a report that I didn't finish reviewing.

I am done with that noise.They can fire me if they don't like it.. No job is worth my health.

 I work till 5 or 6 if needed. I don' t log on for weekend unless ABSOLUTELY necessary. I am setting those boundaries and sticking to them.

Funny thing... I am sleeping again. I am not stress eating and I am two weeks back into a workout routine. I am doing MUCH better.

Working remotely has it's advantages, but also its very easy to overwork,.I am learning how to balance it all.

 But I digress.....

So to my point,  horses are still very much a part of my life. I don't ever see that changing. I spent alot of time questioning  that this year but I realized something. It wasn't that I had lost interest in horses or riding or any of it.  It was all the other "crap" getting in the way of  letting myself enjoy them like I once did.

I don't regret selling Maggie. She is with a great family and they are doing great things with her. But it did leave a void.  It wasn't  like I went cold turkey with not having a horse around the place after she left.  We have 4 others to choose from !  I have a special bond with both Rebel and JB but  the reality is that neither is a reliable mount. They have alot of limitations because of  their unique health issues.

It's funny how things have worked out.. everything all in good time. Its like I had to go through some crap to get back to being me.  I am getting there.

I really didn't anticipate looking for another horse until Spring but ..... as l said.. funny how things turn out...

It's been a process but I have NEWS.. HORSE NEWS!!

Stay tuned for info about an upcoming  special delivery to Acer Farm next month!
Ok,  because that is kinda mean and I really like my readers to keep reading....

I will give you a tidbit- heres a photo...I just loved him the first time I laid eyes on him. No was not an option in this case. He's my dream horse. A Grey Anglo. To top it off, he goes back to one of my favorite TB lines.

Cryptoclearance. Better yet, Cryptoclearance on the Dam's side. (its a breeding thing)

It had to have been fate finding this yearling colt.

I also didn't anticipate having another colt to start . After I sold Maggie I told myself that the next horse I got was going to be started and going well under saddle so I didn't need to  deal with all that again. That is all I have been doing for over 10 years now is starting youngsters. I really wanted to get away from it.

But I realized that this probably works out better given the circumstances. I don't need to do anything but play with this punk for the next year or two. NO pressure! Just have fun teaching him groundwork and exposing him to all kinds of stuff. Cows, trail obstacles, water, etc. That is the fun stuff if you ask me.

I think it's going to be a beautiful thing!

In the meantime, I am off to the home gym to crank out a workout !

Arrivederci, amico


irish horse said...

First I'm sorry about JB and also your health, very scary!

Trying to fit it all in is hard. I did the same thing professionally for a long time. Then something clicked, and life was more important than work. I'm glad you're finding the balance too.

But I literally gasped in excitement over your new colt. And another lover of Cryptoclearance! His presence just ignited an even bigger horse fire in me as a teenager. When you talk about your new colt I'd love the read why the dam line is what you like.

Great new changes, congrats.

Jonna said...

Thanks Irish Horse.. its all about priorities and find a balance.
Thank you for sharing in my excitement. Crytpclearance was an exceptional horse. I will be sure to talk about why the preference for the dam side of Cryptoclearance

Now the wait will nearly kill me!

CG said...

Great looking colt!! Enjoy him :)